Crowder / Gungor / August / McMillan

To further twist the knife, I just want to take a minute to talk about this AWESOME concert. Seriously, if you get a chance to see the 7 Tour, go buy tickets! I didn't realize it until we got there, but not only did we see the David Crowder Band and Gungor, but the concert also included Chris August and John Mark McMillan. Sure, we may not have gotten back to Rockport until 3 this morning, but I'd say it was well worth the trip!

Gungor

Gungor has been a huge favorite of mine since I discovered their music at Passion this year. Michael Gungor kind of looks like an adult Napoleon Dynamite (the picture above just doesn't do it justice. Check this out-

I can't even begin to describe the talent these two bring to the band. Michael can play the guitar like nobody I've ever seen before! Last night, we saw an "acoustic" set, consisting of Michael & Lisa and a cello player. It was incredible! Gungor is planning a spring tour with the full band and you can bet I'll be there. Beautiful Things and Ghosts Upon the Earth will be the best $20 you've spent on music in a long time. Eclectic but intriguing and extraordinary.

David Crowder Band

This may be the 4th or 5th time I've seen the Crowder band and have never been disappointed. The only thing I'm disappointed with is knowing that after Passion 2012, the Crowder band is breaking up. About halfway through the Crowder set, one of the amps on stage caught on fire. I may have felt a little sense of panic for about 3 seconds, but the band kept on playing and acted as if the blaze didn't even phase them. One of the roadies doused the amp with a bottle of water and we were all saved from either burning to death or dying in a panicked crowd stampede.

Maybe that's a little overdramatic.

McMillan / Crowder / Gungor

At the end of the concert, David Crowder did "How He Loves" with Michael Gungor and John Mark McMillan (the guy who actually wrote the song). It was fantastic.

In other news, I'll board a few vans this afternoon with 25 middle and high school girls for the second annual FBCR Girl's Retreat. We're traveling to a town outside of Brenham and spending lots of time digging into God's Word. Please please please keep us lifted up in prayer this weekend. Pray for the girls and leaders. Pray for safety as we travel. Pray that the drama will be left at home (30 girls in a room together? Dramacentral!). Pray that God's Word would be evident and understood. Full report to come as well as the next L&D installment.

Stay tuned!

Not Playing Around

I am the proud (almost) owner of the following pair these deliciously gorgeous leather lovelies:

And obtaining these beauties was no laughing matter! Rewind time by about a week and you'll find me finally coming to terms with the idea of skinny jeans. Up until this weekend, I'd bucked the trend, mostly because I'd never really liked what they did for my girlish figure. When Carin and I went to the incredible outlet malls in San Marcos, my #1 priority was finding the perfect pair of skinny jeans and some great brown boots for fall.

Thank you J. Crew for having all your jeans on sale this weekend. You are the bomb.com.

But I wasn't nearly as successful finding boots - until today. First, I got an email from my absolute most-loved clothing obsession, Anthropologie. Right now, boots and outerwear are 30% off! Score! So I find these awesome Frye boots and immediately know they'll be the perfect fall boots to go with my new jeans. Only problem? They're only available in a 5 and my 9.5 size foot will NOT squeeze into a 5.

And so the quest for the perfect fall boot begins.

Drawing from my years in retail sales @ the Gap, I know I can call the nearest store and see if these brown beauties are available in a larger size. I remember that Jordan and I will be in Houston again this Thursday (Be jealous. Verrrrrry Jealous. I'll be spending my Thursday night listening to Gungor and David Crowder.), so I begin my search in Houston.

Phone call #1: The store I call doesn't carry full priced shoes. The only chance I have is finding a returned pair, which is a bust. According to the girl I'm chatting with, the Austin store has a pair in my size. The search continues.

Phone call #2: This store has a few pairs of the boots in stock, but aren't actually size 9.5, they only have 8.5. This helpful sales girl encourages me to call the SoHo, NYC store. She ensures me that the NYC stores are my best bet because they are all huge and keep tons of stock. She gives me numbers for two stores and I continue the calls.

Phone call #3: Apparently, no store on the east coast received these boots. This helpful sales girl tells me she is bewildered that the Austin store would send me to her store because there are no boots available within several states. She searches through stores on the west coast and informs me that there are no boots on the west coast either. Now I'm starting to get discouraged. Did I mention I had an anthro gift card that was just dying to be spent on a fantastic pair of leather boots? If only I could find them! The salesgirl does a nationwide search and discovers that a store in Madison, Wisconsin has one pair in their inventory. She gives me the number and I proceed with hesitation. At this point, I'm thinking that it's just not meant to be.

Phone call #4: I explain for the fourth time what I'm looking for and the sales girl immediately tells me that their store does not carry shoes. Ugh. In a last-ditch effort, I tell her about the phone call with the NYC store and she goes, "Are you looking for the Frye boots?! I think we have 1 pair!" So I wait on hold....

.... and then I ordered the last pair (apparently) of size 9.5 Frye boots in the entire United States of America. On sale. With a gift card. From Wisconsin. That's legit. In 5-7 business days they'll be in my arms. Or well, on my feet.

Ouch

This has been an interesting week! I haven't had a spare minute to write anything on my blog because I've spent a great deal of time working on the materials for the second annual FBC Rockport Girl's Retreat! Can you even believe it's next weekend?! And we have almost filled up 2 vans with girls who are eager to dig into God's Word! I am so blessed. The weekend is centered around the idea that we're all Made for More. We will spend a great deal of time studying the Saul/Paul conversion - what an incredible picture of God's greatness displayed! I'm really REALLY excited for next weekend and am asking that my lovely blog readers spend some time on their knees in prayer for these girls next weekend. God's Word never comes back void.

Next..... I studied for, took and passed my certification exam. Just call me Hollie, RNC-OB. Here are 2 conversations I've had with my husband and mother-in-law regarding my certification:

Jordan: (driving to the testing center): So what exactly does this certification mean?

Me: Umm... that I know what I'm doing?

Jordan: So why exactly are you taking it?

Me: Well, I thought it might look good on grad school applications, if I ever decide to reapply.

Jordan: Oh ok. How much did it cost to take this thing?

Me: $300

Jordan: $300?! ......... So why exactly are you taking it?

MIL: (At dinner) So what exactly does this certification mean?

Me: Umm... that I know what I'm doing?

MIL: So what about all those babies that you've had the last 4 years? You didn't know what you were doing then?????

Me: I guess they just got lucky.

So there you have it folks. According to the NCC, I guess I know what this labor thing is all about.

Then after all that, I completed my first triathlon. It was the sprint variety, but that didn't keep me from feeling like my life was flashing before my eyes during the run portion. The swim was 500 meters, bike was 14 miles and the run was a measly (but excruciating) 5k. I have a friend who completed a half Ironman (70.3) today. She's a total rockstar, and I feel rather wimpy complaining about how sore I am.

Pre-race smiles and jitters. We raced at Aquarena Springs in San Marcos, Tx. By far, the best part of the weekend was the post race shopping spree at the incredible outlet mall in San Marcos.

At the finish line. Please let it be noted by all the readers of this blog that there is someone running up to the finish line behind us, which means I didn't come in dead last. Plus, I out-sprinted a 13 year old on the way to the finish, meaning I wasn't second-to-last either. The race took me a lot longer than I anticipated and was harder than the 2 half marathons I've completed in the past. Today I'm sore in places I didn't know existed. Ouch.

Let it be known that on this day: Sunday, September 25 at 9:58pm (21:58), I, Hollie Marie, hereby announce my retirement from the sport of running triathlons. While I appreciate (ha!) the countless hours poured into preparing for this time, I feel it is in my best interest (mostly for my sanity) to step down indefinitely (aka: forever.).

Sunday Dinner

Raise your hand if you're from the south and refer to post-church lunch as Sunday dinner.

One of our awesome students (and her family!) treated almost all of the youth workers, myself, and Jordan to lunch at her house. It was such a treat and truly a confidence boost to hear Destiny and her mom tell us all how much they appreciate our work in the church. It was also wonderful to share a meal with those people who tirelessly help us make this youth ministry work. Sure, we spent most of the meal strategizing our next youth event, talking logistics and rules and plans of the dreaded lock-in. But regardless of the conversation, it was a treat to fellowship and eat together.

One of the things I quickly learned being the wife of a minister is that life in ministry isn't ever rainbows and kittens. My favorite lady, once told me and Jordan that "life in ministry has higher highs and lower lows than people in the secular world will ever experience or understand." I would consider myself "on the sidelines" of my husband's job, and even though I'm not the man in charge, I still feel like life can be lonely, exciting, frustrating, and full of joy. It's a conundrum. I don't say all this to make you feel sorry for me- I say it to encourage you to turn around and tell your church leadership how much you appreciate them! These men (and ladies) work around the clock to serve the Lord and often do so without complaint, even when the people they serve aren't so quiet. Your pastors don't work for accolades, but a little encouragement makes everyone's day a little brighter.

Not only did we have a delicious lunch together, but we also celebrated a birthday!!! Happy Birthday Roy!

I can't say it enough- Jordan and I are so lucky to have such a great group of adults that are involved in the lives of our students. I shudder to think about a large group of unsupervised teenagers. We couldn't do it without our awesome helpers! We love you guys!

Weird

The last few days I've worked have been littered with weirdness. It was a full moon and though it's cliche'd, I am going to blame some of the ridiculousness on that.

For example:

-For the first time ever, I was fired from patient care by a family member. Literally, "Please get out of my daughter's room. You have an attitude problem and you need to go sleep it off." Ive never been fired before, but the entire family (patient included) was a whack-job, so I was pleased to give up the assignment. I felt a little vindicated when the patient's doctor went in the room and gave her a little attitude adjustment.

-I did my first contraction stress test where the contractions were induced by nipple stimulation. Imagine my embarrassment trying to explain the plan of care to my patient.... Tweak for 2 minutes, off for 5. Awkward!

-I had a patient freak out after coming to the conclusion that her husband was cheating on her. After talking to her and calming the meltdown, I found out that not only was SHE the one doing the cheating, but her husband was also in the dark about a previous pregnancy. Wait - What?!?

I think anyone in healthcare would agree that somedays you have fun and normal patients and some days you get the strangest people e.v.e.r.

Please?

Names and Nonsense

So we all know someone who knows someone whose kid went to school with a kid who had a friend who's twin cousins were named Lemonjello and Orangejello. Or a girl named Female. Or Gonorrhea. At the recommendation of a friend, I've added the ubiquitous "name" question into the mix.

What's the strangest or most unique baby name you've ever heard?

I polled a LOT of nurses for this one- and I wanted names that someone has actually had contact with, not the mysterious kid named Lucifer. Only problem is that it's often so busy on the unit that it's hard to remember what sex our patient's baby is, much less what the baby's name is going to be. I worked today and took care of 3 separate patients and couldn't tell you one baby name. As for working yesterday? Fuhgeddaboutit.

So when you get one of those really off-the-wall names, it's not only memorable, but word makes its way from one side of the labor unit to the other. Many of the nurses said a lot of the same names, in fact- three of the top 5 names were mentioned by every nurse I surveyed. Feast your eyes on the 5 most unique baby names as determined by my fellow nurses:

-Abcde (It's pronounced "absidy")

-Rooster

-Chlamydia (As in the STD. May also answer to "Clap")

-Stargazer

-Nevaeh. Lets stop here for a second. This weed of a name has to be the most popular and off-the-wall name for the 17 & under clan. Phonetically, it makes no sense. Nevaeh = Na-vay-ah just like 1+1=5. Now, I know what you're gonna say: But Hollie!! - It's Heaven spelled backwards! That's just so unique! Yeah, and last year it was #25 on the Social Security Administration's list of most popular baby names. So not only is this a ridiculous and mispronounced name, it's also not at all unique. If you like the name Heaven, just name your baby Heaven. Am I the only one who think this name is absolutely asinine?

And we can't look at the most unique names without also visiting the most common names! Just like with every other question, I asked around first and came to a consensus. I had a considerable list and pared it down to just a few. Check out the 5 most popular boy and/or girl names as determined by the able-bodied ladies I work with.

-Isabella... Or anything with the "Bella" suffix. Thanks Twilight. Now every first grade class is going to have at least 4 girls named Bella for the next few years.

-Ava

-"Jr" I don't know if it's just a local or cultural thing, but here in Corpus Christi, it is extremely popular to name your son after his father. Here's a conversation with a dad regarding his pride & joy:

Me: So what's your son's name going to be?

Dad: He's gon' have my name.

Me: Oh, so he'll be a junior??

Dad: Well he's gon' be number four.

Me: Wow! A Fourth!

(a few moments pass)

Dad: Well, actually we gon' name him after my dad.

Hm. Howabout that.

-Aiden (or any of it's counterparts. IE: Brayden, Caiden, Jayden, Hayden)

-"Biblical/old" names. Like Noah, Jeremiah, Hannah, Elijah, Levi, etc. I had a patient once who named her kiddo Jeddidiah, which is unique enough as it is. And then I found out that they were huge Star Wars fans and were planning to call their baby Jedi.

Awesome.

Gross out

Here we go again! Go read the last disclaimer. I figure if you're still hanging around after the Poop-apalooza, you're probably in for the long haul.

What's the grossest thing you've ever seen??

I polled a whole group of people for some great stories about this one. Here are a few of my own:

-4th degree tears. (shudders.) Seeing someone's bottom bust open will drive a nulliparous woman to primary elective c-sections. It's ugly. Imagine putting a bomb in your vagina and lighting the fuse.

-Rectal prolapse: AKA The worst hemorrhoids you've EVER seen. I've only seen this one time and it gave me even more cause to elect for a primary c-section (more on that later.). Poor little lady- every time she pushed, her little rectum would peek out a little more and a little more until finally there were several inches of her insides on the outside.

-Condylomas: The gift that keeps on giving. Genital warts are naaaaaasty. Let me say it again, those crunchy-feeling cauliflower-looking warts are absolutely disgusting. I've seen patients with warts extending from their anus all the way up to the cervix. I've heard stories of warts so big they clog up the baby slip-n-slide, making a c-section the only method of delivery.

And now here are a few from my coworkers and physicians:

-Lots of complaints of chunky half-digested food barf. Labor isn't kind on the digestive tract and it's not uncommon for women to throw up during the process. And every once in a while, we're lucky enough to be hurled upon.

-Not only do labor nurses and doctors occasionally get a puke shower, sometimes we get an amniotic fluid shower. Sometimes that stuff just shoots out. Dr. X told us about a time during a delivery where she wasn't wearing a face shield/mask and got sprayed in the face with amniotic fluid. Apparently, it has a mild salty taste.

-Another fun doctor story comes from the ER, not from L&D, however, those of you readers with XX chromosomes will enjoy (or gag) at this story: Dr. X is on call one night and gets a message from a family medicine resident to urgently come see a patient in the ER. The young woman came in complaining of vaginal discharge and after a full work-up, the resident was certain she had high grade cervical cancer. Dr. X makes her way to the ER to assess the situation. What she pulled out of this woman's vagina was enough to make the resident pass out right there at the bedside. Apparently, the patient had forgotten to take her tampon out and it'd been up there for weeks.

-Revisiting the cleanliness issue, sometimes we get patients who are of the super morbid obese variety. Like, so big it's impossible to know she is pregnant. Or better yet, makes you wonder how in the world she got pregnant in the first place. These patients have skin folds that sometimes don't get washed for weeks just because it might be almost impossible to reach them. I had reports from some nurses saying they've found live bugs in these cavernous crevices.

And while most of these labor & delivery tell-all blogs have flirted with the line separating appropriate and inappropriate, there are a few truly shocking and disgusting things that I've witnessed that are completely inappropriate for this arena. Remember, L&D isn't always about healthy moms having healthy babies (as if I haven't already made that blatantly obvious). Sometimes life in L&D is heart wrenching. Sometimes it is truly gruesome. So I hope I'm not disappointing anyone in choosing not to share some of my more horrific experiences, not only to respect the patients who lived through the event, but also to respect my lovely and wonderful readers.

Stay tuned! More funny, gross, and shocking stories on the way!

Research & New Finds

We're back home after a lovely weekend in Augusta and I am ready to jump back into the labor and delivery q&a. I totally appreciate all the supportive comments and am thinking of turning this thing into a recurring blog feature. I have several more questions to answer and am working the next few days, so once again, I'll poll the coworkers to find out some popular answers to the next few questions:

-What's the grossest thing you've ever seen?

-What's your advice for nursing students? (I may even expand this topic to include patient's family members and well-meaning visitors.)

-Have any "I didn't know I was pregnant" stories?

Stay tuned friends!!!